Why are otherkin born? To Guard? Humans do that as well, in military, and in home. there is nothing that guards more than a young mother and her child. We as otherkin are so sure of our identities, are we not? We are what we are, and once we reach a certain stage, we do not question that, eh? You are a sidhe, though you search for memories and such, that does not change. You are a dragon, though you seek details, that does not change. Your race, though you are human, is a certainly from which you do not leave. One finds one, and four are found. A human finds another human, and they are both different, they are both kin. So two more are born, flesh of your flesh, mind of your mind, a foreign creation that you wake within yourself like a ravening beast in your bowels.

Why are we different, what makes a soul something other than human? Is a soul truly intangible, or is it that a soul is so multi-faceted, it is impossible to pinpoint it's creation? If the soul of a human is so easily put aside, to cast on the cape of a dragon soul and parade around in it like it is All Hallow's Eve, and you are the ghost of your kinside risen from a grave it never rested easily in. What plan brings this to you? Can you remember a time when you were not different, when others did not see you and laugh? If you have always been kin, where is your humanity? Why is it so easily put aside for this different, odder, more complex persona? I do not accuse of role play, we all know what we are, what we can be, but I puzzle this.

Are we some Luciferian experiment, a product of what the Nephilim wrought? Are we what was left behind, meant to die, what was brought to life devoid of the humanity that would otherwise have made us part of the world? Are we a plot on grand scales, balanced in blindness and self-pity? Or are we alone, as you would say, and unshaken by the tongues of blasphemy that would call with their honey and kindness to draw us to divine instruction? Is it beyond the constructs of nature and God that we are? This restless knowledge, this Akasha that lives and breathes so like a lifeform in itself, is it truly what we believe, and holds all the answers to our identity? Or are we self-contained units, meant to search and find within ourselves the ultimate meaning.

But what is that ultimate meaning? So many kin, they find their identity, and that is it. What of the ones who seek further, who seek the roots by which all was won and lost? Who are they? And why do I feel that I must follow in their overlarge footsteps, holding only my candle against the darkness? It is a strange thing to think on this. What made our spirits rebel, that they would cast down any humanity that exists within them, and fight a war within themselves to find peace? In their own destruction, there is peace. Why then, do we as kin have emotions? Why are we so human? Do not say that it is the limits of human body, you know that is bullshit. Why should I believe that I exist at all, when I cannot claim that i am human.

Is this not a human world? Are those not humans that surround you? So why then do you wander as you do? what drives you to be what you are, and see as you do? Sometimes, you say you are human, but you are kin, are you not? Sounds as if the body that is a temple is a crowded place. Do we rebel against the highest of high, or do we simply end what they begun? Is there a "they" within the world, or is it without of the world?

The day my world begun, I was awakened. Does that negate the world in which I was human? Is being a kin existence on another plane from that of humanity? Am I simply not human, because I feel my twin tails, I feel my wings, and the dragon strength is so far within me that i am never without? Am i not human because the shadow runs in my blood, and I am following a path created for me and by me? Am I not human because within me lie the spirits of a hundred souls, and the soul of a single person? What is that person? What is it to be me, or to be you, or to be alive? Is it not compatible to be human and dragon? Human and Dragon, Dragon and Shadow, what does it matter? Why does it matter? Why should i not exist, and keep what I am to myself?

What is the destiny or fate of what I ultimately will become? How will I know when I am that? Who do we wake at all, when we know death is our inevitability, that one day, our body will die, and we will leave. What is the purpose, when all I know is the greyness of waiting, of never seeing heaven or hell? Is it a curse to be a kin, to feel the power of that run within me, is that why I see nothing save the shadows? Our coexistence within ourselves is a shadow. A nonexistence, where pain is amplified, and life is a still, calm pond where there is nothing at the bottom, just the cold dark waters closing over the head. A shadow cycle, nothing leaving, nothing entering, where the answers are within, and no one can retrieve them from where they sleep within the soul. Our cycle, our kindred, what is it that drives a person to renounce their humanity to take up the mantle of being a kin?

There are such depths, waiting, wandering, sleeping in the bottoms of souls without gender or feeling. Losing myself in the swells and ebbs of others would not be hard. Such is the curse of this kin. And yet, I accept that i am kin. I can be nothing else. I can rise with nothing else. I can do nothing save reach out and touch the souls that accept me. I can do nothing save give all that I am without the selfishness of desired life. For to be human is to hurt, and to be kin is to give, right? So if you are both, you hurt as you give, and yet the cycle is not something you may end. It is existence, the existence of the shadow-dragon, who does not understand, and yet sees the deep currents. I as a kin wish i could hold all kin safe, could draw their memories from t hem and keep them from knowing their own terrible truths, and yet these truths are what they seek to stay alive with.

I know that the truth of what i am is not the truth that others have of me. But truth is a human word, a human concept, and if I am kin, why should I attempt to be what is true? Why should i exist, when there is nothing in me of the existence of humanity? If this is my earth, and my plain, why would it require my existence to be what it is? Why should i brood as I do, and wish for what is not there, and will never be there. This is not what i am, it is what i will be, and what I was. But the past dictates what i am, so is it not that what i was is what I am? what if what I am is not what i am, but what has always been?

Eternal circles, a dragon chasing her tail, a snake devouring itself. I am the questioner, but the questions are not the questions you would see. I do not like knowing what i do not know, and seeing what I cannot see. It is not right that I should be as I am, and yet what i am is what i have made of myself. What you are is what you have created, what you have spun into yourself. There is only the self in the end, neither soul nor spirit can claim what is the self, and what the self is is what the thought is.